Warning: This is just a quick, little life update. No profound epiphanies here. I promise.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the past two days, it is that I really really hate being in pain but I really really love complaining about it.
Yesterday I got my wisdom teeth out. Upon waking up from the surgery, I cried for about 45 minutes straight. I literally sat and bawled my eyes out. Now, most of this is probably due to the drugs, but I was also terrified because 1) I did not think I had a tongue and 2) I thought there was a dog stuck in a video camera on the ceiling. So yeah, probably the drugs.
I’m also always the first person to send an Evite out to my own (self) pity party. I mean, I can do anything I set my mind to, no matter how brutal or daunting a task, but I will shed some tears along the way. Call it a flaw in my character, call it actually showing emotion. You can choose. Bottom line, party will be at 1pm tomorrow. Please bring shmushy dairy-free food. I repeat. No dairy. Let’s just call the fact that I can’t even enjoy a good ice cream sundae during my recovery another reason this party is totally and completely necessary. Also btw, presents not mandatory, but required.
Luckily I have the best childhood babysitter/second mom in the world who has spoon fed me every meal so far and allowed me to be the drama queen of the century. A few other thank yous: the male nurse who held my hand and got me a blanket as I snotted, cried, and shivered in the doctors office, my dad for watching me drool a lot of blood & making sure I didn’t get it on the furniture, my boyfriend for not breaking up with me for being a diva (we’re talking Jenna Maroney 30 Rock vibes), my sister for telling me I’m the most hilarious chipmunk ever, and my mom for planning this whole torturous affair.
I would end this with some adorable videos of me singing my two favorite musicals, Hamilton and Les Mis, while extremely under the influence of anesthesia but we really don’t need that on the internet forever. And I forgot to save the Hamilton one. So life just got a whole lot more tragic.
Stuck in my head: Reminder // The Weeknd
Snap it: Dolcezza Factory, DC (AKA What I want to eat right now. This second. Please.)