Sophomore year, you were the worst. But you brought some of the best people and memories into my life and for that, I am so grateful.
I was in the middle of writing a post to let you all know that I was taking a break from creating content due to lack of creative flow. But, I realized that my reasoning was a cop out from explaining what I’m actually experiencing right now- true, brutal burnout. Not in respect to everything I’m doing- I still love my internship, exercise, and AOII. But, overall, things have just been a lot harder to get done lately.
I’m not a stranger to low energy levels. I think it all comes in a cycle with stress and sleep and self-care, but of recent, naps have become the norm and I count the hours until I get to crawl into bed with my book. I miss being engaged by my lectures and excited to do well. For the first time in my life, not even an A is motivation.
Related but unrelated, I’ve also been fighting to find a state of peace in facing certain challenges in life. Recently, I’ve been focusing on mental illness, and how it’s okay not to be okay, and learning to be a strong hand to hold for those struggling. I’m also working past shutting down emotionally during chaotic times and showing vulnerability where I would normally prefer to pretend nothing is wrong. I’ve had to accept broken things as being broken and give up on them- which has been the hardest, most taxing experience for me. It’s been really draining, I’m not going to lie. And where I would normally say I’ve had profound moments of realization in the process, I’m going to say that I haven’t yet. But, I will never stop trying to find comfort in the process.
This post seems sad. It may sound lonely or withdrawn from, but it’s written with determination and self-actualization. My mind needs a break and I want to focus on different things for a little. Like actually doing my accounting homework. And spending time with the amazing women that have built me an enviable support network. And finally facing my fear of writing for myself instead of for others.
Burning out is normal, but it’s about the recovery that comes after. I’m looking for little things that continuously spark happiness in my life. Like loving DC so much I want to cry when I walk the streets. And the memory of hearing Houndmouth for the first time at a music festival and feeling so genuinely in love inside.
I’ll write more soon. I just need to press pause and breathe and drink some tea. Then I’ll be back, avocado toast and all.
Until then, I promise I’ll still be on Instagram.
Stuck in my head: Sun Veins // Hippo Campus
Snap it: The Coffee Bar, DC
Last night was the Girls’ Night In book club meet up in DC (shameless plug for GNI- follow their Instagram and subscribe to their newsletter) and let me just tell you it took me back to high school English class in the best way possible. Not only did we discuss a book that was interesting (Goodbye, Vitamin by Rachel Khong) but it gave me the creative inertia to write something again. So like, also, hi. It’s been a while.
I started reading again at the beginning of this year because I was having trouble sleeping at night. I could give you scientific facts about how technology inhibits the secretion of melatonin in the brain or whatever, but instead, I’m just gonna go with the fact that you’ve probably suffered from technology-induced insomnia, too. And the worst part of not being able to fall asleep is the stress of knowing you can’t fall asleep. It’s honestly just a downward spiral to panic-ville. Not cute.
But, aside from upping my nighttime routine, reading re-sparked my love for being creative and telling stories. I found myself analyzing storytelling techniques, mimicking character development, and more generally, being mindful of the way I reveal plot points in my own stories. Reflecting on the differences in the characters I was reading about lead me to develop an understanding of narratives from different perspectives. A kind of empathy I could bring to the real world.
The book club didn’t make me realize this- I was already conscious of my reading revival. But, the book club helped me realize that there are other women out there that want to grow from the books they’re reading, too. They want to understand the relationships between characters and relate it to their own personal development.
Goodbye, Vitamin was not the easiest book for me to relate to. The characters are much older, the subject touches on illness in the family and divorce, and the main character is extremely immature and underdeveloped. Yet, through the writing style of the book, I was able to fall for the positive spin on the plot’s most tragic moments. It was my type of thinking, my type of approach to challenges in life. In a time of stress and self-inflicted isolation due to exam week overload, it was nice to come home and share my perspective with someone- even if all else was completely unrelatable to me.
So to conclude, read a book. It’s unfortunate how we don’t appreciate words on a page as much as subtitles on a screen. I think it’s time to trade Netflix for novels. Not optional. Please and thank you.
Stuck in my head: Tuesday // Hippo Campus
Snap it: my beeeeed!
P.S. The March book club book is Text Me When You Get Home. Check it out.
Life works in crazy ways- but for some reason, it always works. I’ve been #blessed with some kick-ass internships and I’ve been lucky to learn so much. This semester is definitely no different.
I’m excited to share my spring internship with Girls’ Night In. Their goal is to “help ambitious millennial women take a break, recharge, and connect with other like-minded women.” Translation: it’s a place to shamelessly put yourself and your health first, and connect with other women that are doing the same. Think the Skimm newsletter meets Refinery29’s girl power meets your best friend.
My role on the team is to manage audience engagement on social media and plan influencer takeovers for Instagram Stories. Two weeks in and I’ve already learned so much it’s incredible. But even better than the experience is the team. I’ve yet to meet a bunch of them, but the CEO/founder, Alisha Ramos, is so smart, talented, and forward-thinking it’s almost absurd. A little background: Alisha left her position at a tech startup to start and focus on Girls’ Night In after she realized her own self-care was slipping. There’s a ton more to the story, and she made sure to share it in this article. After just the first four collaboration sessions, I’m already thinking more about creating purposeful content, staying on brand, and prioritizing work-life balance.
Besides being an amazing opportunity, GNI’s mission hits home for me. By now you’ve probably realized that I’m a bonified psycho when it comes to staying busy, productive, and breathless. Between lectures, internships, sorority, and clubs, sometimes the *pause* moments slip away. This semester I want to internalize the message I’m sharing with GNI and make more time for the calm before the storm that is my life.
For me, self-care looks like 6:30am workout sessions, reading before bed, trying to remember to moisturize, and writing about the challenges and celebrations in my life. I want to learn how to treat myself to doing nothing and indulging in things that innately make me feel guilty- like cake and sleeping in. Self-care isn’t selfish and it’s time for me to accept it.
So, by now you should all be busting out of your seats to follow Girls’ Night In on Instagram. And I feel like I definitely undermentioned their killer newsletter that gives me a reason to get going every Friday. Think weekly must-haves, must-reads, and must-see gifs. And watch their #SelfCareSaturday takeover series every week to see all my hard work in action.
Oh, and get ready for a whole lot of self-love. Because it’s here to stay.
Stuck in my head: Issues // Julia Michaels
Snap it: Shamelessly drove to the closest mural to take this… Hyattsville, MD
New Year’s Eve has long since come and gone, but those little things called resolutions are technically still hanging around. If you were inspired to up your fitness level this winter, the original motivation of your goal might be starting to waver. It’s cold outside. It’s hard to get in shape. It’s not easy to change old habits.
Here are my top 10 tips for staying active, even when everything inside you screams “give it up already!”
1. Put each workout on your calendar
Make yourself a plan and stick to it. It’ll be hard in the beginning, but by making trips to the gym part of your day, like a work meeting or class, it becomes more routine. And inevitably, less painful. You should see my Google Calendar- I’ve got it down to the leg day.
2. Carry healthy power snacks with you
It’s easy to make an excuse for skipping the gym. My number one: I didn’t have the power to workout because I was too hungry. By carrying foods that fuel a workout, like almonds and protein bars, you’ll always have the pick-me-up you need.
3. Don’t be afraid to try new workouts
Treadmills get stale quick, as do 7 spin classes or 7 lifts or 7 Zumbas a week. Don’t be afraid to mix it up. It’ll challenge your body more and give you the ability to find what really gets you excited to be active. You never know what you might love until you lace up your sneakers and go.
4. Have an idea of what your workout is… before you get to the gym
You’ll waste less time and be able to accomplish more in a shorter period of time. If you’re unsure of your workout, you might default to less effective, more generic moves, rather than things that could really challenge and change you. Or even worse, resort to walking around trying to figure out what to do. Which leads me to my next suggestion…
5. Keep a log of workouts on your phone
Instagram, Pinterest, and Youtube are amazing resources to help plan workouts. There are more things out there than pushups and situps and ellipticals. Explore different circuits that hit muscles you didn’t think of before. Honestly, it can be even easier than Insta- a simple Google search can yield millions of options. My personal favorites are this ab killer and this youtube video that’s going to turn me into Gigi Hadid.
6. Ease your way into fitness & take your recovery days
No one said you have to be John Cena on day one. Give your body time to build up strength and work towards higher weights, rather than grabbing them from the start. Along with that, make sure to give your body time to heal post workout. This means stretching and rolling your muscles but also taking a day or two off a week to relax and heal.
7. Not every workout has to be the best
Sometimes half the battle is getting to the gym. Give yourself a break if you’re lifting lighter or sprinting slower some days. Fitness is a cumulative process. Somedays will be stronger than others. And when you are having an off day, take it a little easier. If you push too hard now, you’ll keep suffering later.
8. Find a workout buddy
What really changed my workout game was finding a partner to lift with (Hi, Sam). While we don’t hype and push each other like some fitness friends, we work towards our goals together and make our time at the gym enjoyable. Don’t get me wrong, we work hard as hell between the hours of 7 to 9am, but if Sam’s in the gym, you know I have to be there, too. Sometimes, it’s all about accountability, baby.
9. Ask when you don’t know
Part one: instead of skipping weird moves or leaving hard classes, ask for modifications to exercises to match them to your fitness level. And part two: I’ve found the fitness community to be excited to show someone the ropes, don’t be afraid to ask how a machine works if you don’t know. There’s no reason you have to figure it out all on your own.
10. Remember: You’ll never regret it once it’s over
The most concrete, absolute, real thing about exercising is that you will NEVER regret a workout once it’s over. When that elbow sweat drops after squats or you hit that flat road at the end of a spin class, being proud is inevitable. It’s why I get to the gym. It’s why the guy next to you gets to the gym. It’s why you get to the gym. No pain, no gain. And definitely no regrets.
So keep running, box jumping, and mountain climbing your way through 2018, friends. Your fitness progress awaits.
Stuck in my head: Go F*ck Yourself // Two Feet
Snap it: A gym near you
Well, here’s the finale. One last stop on my Southeast Asia world tour.
I have to say, two days on this little island in the sun just wasn’t enough. The views are unforgettable and the memories are definitely keepers. The end of this trip was focused on three things: sun, scuba, and sea caves. And believe me, add this destination to your bucket list asap.
Passports ready? This last one is Phuket, Thailand.
Gotta say, it’s good to be home. Here come a whole lot of egg whites, spin classes, and pre-semester shopping trips.
Stuck in my head: Dead Sea // Lumineers
Snap it: Phuket, Thailand
So close to the finish line. Aka, my next spin class. But until then…
Singapore brought rain, but it also brought this little thing called education. Our stay was packed full of company HQ visits that top the charts of the coolness scale. My inner workaholic was going wild. I’m talking pure fangirl at some stops.
While this skyline’s no New York, it’s definitely new to me.
Passports ready? This one’s Singapore.
Stuck in my head: Downtown // Lilla Vargen
Snap it: Singapore, Singapore
Businesses visited: FusionWorld, Yahoo, Facebook, AJ Hackett, Tiger Brewery, Marina Bay Sans, Google, LinkedIn, Singapore Airlines, Accenture
Good morning, Vietnam! Watched the first 20 minutes of that movie so the reference feels justified.
Well, friends, we’ve reached the part of my trip where I have to start re-wearing clothes and all I can think about is a salad. But have no fear, I’m in the land of Pho and I’ve never thrived more.
This part of our trip has been the most educational. We’ve explored the Vietnam War from the other side of the world, floated down the Mekong River, and stocked up on fresh mango. From the Chu Chi Tunnels (where I got hit in the face with a live bat) to business visits with Nike and Intel, it’s been a lot to take in. Not to mention there are more scooters in this city than pictures of brunch on my camera roll.
Passports ready? This one’s Ho Chi Minh city.
Stuck in my head: Obsession // Vice, Jon Bellion
Snap it: Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam
This winter break, I packed my 40-pound suitcase and hit the air. 23 hours later it’s all Pad Thai and Buddhas and I’m living an Instagrammer’s dream. Welcome to my Southeast Asia Study Abroad series: Little Girl, Big Trip. Prepare for a whole lot of munching, temple lovin’, and travel vibes.
Passports ready? This one’s Bangkok, Thailand.
Stuck in my head: Hate That You Know Me // Bleachers
Snap it: Bangkok, Thailand
I’ve been putting a lot of thought into what industry I want to work in. Where do my passions lie, what do I believe in, what do I want to promote? Pivoting is hard, especially when your portfolio screams “pass her a fork and take her to brunch, this girl looks like a foodie.” But in all honesty, I’m not a foodie, I’m an eater. I’m not going to swoon over a hint of truffle, but I’ll swallow and smile if it tastes as good as it sounds.
To me, the food industry isn’t at all about the product. I could do without the fancy prime rib or secret sauce. Raid my fridge and all you’ll find is day old sushi and egg whites. But when I see food, I think about the connection that’s forged when a meal is shared. It’s the storytelling capabilities of a bowl of pasta that’s got me pretty hooked. It’s what’s revealed when a person asks you to “pass the pepper, not the salt,” that makes me lean in and listen.
Let me lay it out for you: take a birthday cake. You’ll rarely find two people completely satisfied by the same piece cake. He’s a chocolate fan, I’m strictly vanilla. She loves cream cheese frosting, I think that if you want cream cheese, go get a bagel. Yet, when we slice it up and hand it out, we’re all celebrating together. It’s not about the bite, it’s about the moment shared, the seconds celebrated, the cheers to the next couple years. The cake is simply the physical manifestation of all that love and happiness.
Or take your beloved Christmas dinner. It doesn’t matter if Aunt Lucy royally screwed it up this year and it tastes like something straight from the garbage, it’s your Christmas dinner. It holds the tradition and sentimentality of your family. It might be that one moment when you all come together and share something for the first time all year. It’s special.
When I look at it like this, marketing food products is storytelling. Pizza isn’t just pizza. It’s a tale of the dough-makers, the sauce-spreaders, the hostess, the diners. “Pass the parmesan” is someone opening up and welcoming a new memory.
Who knows if food is where I belong. It’s one of the only areas I’ve ever worked in. And while I explore and experiment, I’ve learned to always pause and appreciate moments with fork and knife in hand.
So, celebrate to the fullest and take a second to hold dear those breaths between bites. Happy holidays!
Stuck in my head: Take Me // Aly & AJ
Snap it: Pizzeria Beddia (classic VSCO pic revival)
When I say pizza, I’m not talking Papa Johns. We’re talking artisan goodness. Never say no to GOOD pizza. That’s how I’ll be celebrating this year.
Post-finals I took a much-needed break and escaped to the concrete jungle. It was two days stuffed full of $6 Fruit Loops from Kellog’s Cereal Bar, brunch at Jack’s Wife Freida, and all the coffee breaks in between. I came home with a fabulous furry pink jacket and a sense of “okay, so when am I moving to the city?”
On Monday morning something big happened. I took my first ever Soul Cycle class. Pause for gasps. I know, you would think I would be all over the trend, but in fact, I was a Soul Virgin. Don’t worry- we fixed that.
To be honest, the class was a little overwhelming. The music was loud (loved it), the other riders were model-esq (loved it less), and the ride was fast and furious (back to love). We’re talking revolutions per minute that could get you to LA in seconds. It was honestly one of the toughest workouts I’ve done in a while. Heart rate through the roof, tongue out panting, sweat pooling on the handlebars.
All in all, I’m not sure the Soul movement is right for me, but I’m all for something that gets people moving. Something that gets people falling in love with exercise. Something that pushes people to hit their max every day. So, while you might not catch me doing tap backs in the candlelit studio, I still love the fitness craze Soul has initiated. It’s truly unique in taking wellness from single player to a team sport.
I can tell that each class is motivation. While it doesn’t get easier, you definitely get stronger. Some part of everyone wants to be the sports-bra wearing regular that owns bike number 6. It’s just a matter of getting up and getting in the saddle.
They say you need three classes to fall into the rhythm, so I’m down to hop on the bike and hit that resistance again soon. Let me know who’s down for a ride.
Stuck in my head: Real Love Baby // Father John Misty
Snap it: SOHO, NYC
Previous post was deleted for certain reasons. Apologies from the blogger still in bed.
This week is so crammed full of T-accounts and Adobe Illustrator I’ve barely had a second to make my avocado toast. So in real W Magazine style, let’s chat about some things we love and some things we could definitely do without.
If you’re like me, the last book you read for fun was either Mindy Kahling’s memoir or something by Judy Bloom. Lately, I’ve been putting more emphasis on putting my well-developed literacy to good use. This month I’m reading Little Fires Everywhere. And to make it even better, research book clubs in your area. Girls Night In Club is where I find most of my book suggestions, but start your own reading revival with your friends. Books are cool, guys! (and let me know if you have any suggestions for my next good read…)
2. Traditional Christmas Party, meet Vodka and Latkes
The holidays are oversaturated with mistletoe this and candy cane that. This season my friends and I put a little Torah twist on December and threw a Vodka and Latkes party, sans the vodka. Aka, we sat around, ate potato pancakes, and listened to Israeli pop music on repeat. For a lot of my friends this was their first *Jewish experience,* and while it wasn’t Shabbat services or a bat mitzvah, it’s all about connecting over different cultures and teaching others what you know.
3. Moon Taxi
From study to workout to chillin’, I’m obsessed. I first found their song Morocco while lurking around on Spotify, and I haven’t turned back. Can you say “indie pop soundtrack to my life?” Check out my favorites: Change, Two High, and Running Wild. All from their 2013 album, but don’t worry I’m working my way to present day. Happy listening.
To be honest, I’m already over it. That’s all I have to say about that.
Yes, I’m talking chicken and turkey. If I see one more white meat meal, I’m going to lose it. This winter I challenge you to add a new protein to your diet. Think quinoa, tofu, mushrooms, lentils. There’s nothing fundamentally wrong with poultry, just the overdose that comes from Thanksgiving. New year, new meat. Let’s do it.
6. My Concussion
I’m officially cleared for exercise and I’ve never been happier… and sorer. The way I feel when I think of hitting the weight room or pushing pedals in spin is how I imagine Christmas morning. To be honest, I’ve been doing two-a-days when my schedule lets me. Catch me in the gym all of break. Literally.
Stuck in my head: Jameson // Zella Day
Snap it: my budding book collections, please send additions to my apartment